Dad number 27

Posted: April 18, 2011 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , ,
Entrance to HM Prison Manchester (Strangeways)

Image via Wikipedia

Me ma introduced me to my new dad today.  Dad number 27 at the last count  if I’m not mistaken.    I came home after school, and there was this skinny fella, making himself dead comfy on our couch, massive spliff in his hand!  Me ma sprung up to introduce him ‘Tommy, meet Binny; your new dad’.

Where the bleeding hell did this fella come from?  Never seen him before in my life!   Binny took a huge drag on his spliff and handed it to me! ‘Pleased to meet you Tommy, here you are lad!’

I backed away and shook my head politely, ‘No ta. ‘  I said ‘no’ for two reasons:

  1. If I get stoned on a joint, then who’s going to bring me ma down and put her to bed when she’s off her face on the whiskey?
  2. I didn’t want to suck on anything that had been anywhere near Binny’s mouth!!

Binny’s teeth (what were left of them) were a mixture of dark marble in colour, with a hint of charred wood!  Put it this way.. you won’t be seeing them on any advert for Colgate any time soon!

Binny didn’t look offended at my refusal of his offer; he just shrugged his shoulders and pulled the spliff back towards his mouth for another drag.  Me ma dug me in the back with her elbow ‘Don’t be rude, Tommy; say hello to your new dad!’

I was forced forward, closer to Binny, ‘Pleased to meet you, but I’ve already got a dad, thanks.’  

I felt a sharp crack on the back of my head from me ma’s hand  ‘You ungrateful little Bastard!  This is your new dad now… your real dad was a good for nothing waster who didn’t want to know you!’

I didn’t know what to say… I know my real dad was a waster, she told me often enough.. but I didn’t want Binny to be my dad either.   I turned and ran from the room, grabbed Regal from my bedroom and walked down to the dockside.

I watched a ferry leaving for the Isle of man… Wish me and Regal were on it.   

The truth is… I know me ma was right… me dad was a waster!   As far as I know he’s in Manchester prison serving a life sentence for murder.. at least that’s what me ma says.    I’ve seen photos of him (at least I think it’s him!).   He’s from a place called Haiti, so me ma says.   He’s black.. but I’m not.. not really.  My skin is slightly darker than me ma’s…  but that’s not saying a lot, ’cause her skin is so white, it’s almost see-through!   I’ve got brown curly hair and brown eyes… but I wouldn’t say I look much like me dad really (IF it IS my dad!).

I’m going to go to Manchester Prison and ask him myself one day!

I watched the Isle of Man Ferry sail off into the distance…….

  1. Jan Gillespie says:

    Brillient, really liked this one. Just gets better, funny and sad all at once!

  2. scousepov says:

    Thanks Jan! Hope you keep reading.. it keeps me writing!

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